How To Stop Tattling

I adore my children but having all 4 of them home all summer can get a little crazy!  Plus my husband working in real estate has a pretty hectic and inconsistent schedule.  So it's a lot of mommy versus the 4 little monkeys.  One things that really makes me want to climb the walls is the amount of tattling.  Yes, I know for children (siblings at that) under 7 years old this is very common but it doesn't make it any less annoying! 

I want my children to tell me things - what's going on at school, with their friends, activities and as they get older I want to know even more but right now I don't need to hear about every time Channing (my 3 year old) drops a crayon on the floor or every time Jameson (my 6 year old) looks at his sister, Breuklynn, "funny". 

I needed a way to explain what tattling was.

From asking around my other mommy friends they didn't really have any answers for me so of course, I turned to Pinterest. (My go-to for almost everything!)

I found this chart.  So simple and so perfect!



Here's what I did.  After breakfast on Sunday morning, I sat my kids down and told them we needed to talk.  I asked them "Does anyone know what tattling is?" No one knew.  OK great start.  So I had a large Bristol board on the table with a T-chart one side for REPORTING and the other for TATTLING.  I used different colour construction paper for each 'blurb'. I had a glue stick for each of the kids, too.  they were going to help me put this together and take ownership and participate. I think when you get children involved in a task there is a deeper and better understanding.

 I started to explain each blurb (which I then wrote on a coloured paper) and the kids took turns gluing each blurb in the proper column. My 3 year old needed some help but he needed to be a part of this. Once we completed the chart together, we reviewed the difference between reporting and tattling.  I then gave them 'real family' situations and they had to tell me if it was reporting or tattling.  "So when Channing goes in Daddy's office (he is not allowed in there) and you tell me - is that reporting or tattling?" "So when Breuklynn is reading books in her room - is that reporting or tattling?" If they got stuck or didn't know.  I referred back to the chart. 

Has this chart completely resolved our tattling? No. But it is helping.  When the kids come to us- we point to the chart (which is on our kitchen window) .  And ask - "are you a reporter or are you a tattle-tale?" They stop and take the time to think and self correct. They do still coming running to us, but as a parent you know your kids' behaviour.  Before they get the 'tattle' out, I direct them to the chart

 

My kids still squabble and bicker like an old married couple but I will say (and my husband agrees) that the tattling is really getting better. A little less tattling in my day makes a difference and I will take it!